The Calling of the Faithful

There comes a moment in every believer’s life when they feel the pull of the slice. It may come in a quiet, reflective moment, staring at a pizza fresh from the oven. It may come during a heated debate over toppings, when one realizes that pizza is not just food, but philosophy, culture, and purpose.

For some, the realization is instant, a revelation as powerful as the first bite of a truly perfect slice. For others, it is a slow awakening, a gradual understanding that pizza is more than a meal—it is a way of life. This is the essence of Crustianity: A Slice of Devotion.

The Three Pillars of the Faith

To be Crustian is not just to eat pizza, but to live by its sacred principles. These principles, passed down through generations, are the foundation upon which the faith stands.

The first and most sacred of these teachings is No Slice Left Behind. In the beginning, there was dough. And from dough came the slice, and from the slice came the greatest commandment of all: pizza must be shared. A true Crustian does not hoard the pizza for themselves. They do not take the last slice without offering. They do not abandon their fellow believers to suffer a pizza-less existence. For as it is written in The Pibble, "He who shares his slice shall never go hungry, but he who hoards shall find his crusts stale and his cheese cold." Sharing is not just a virtue—it is the foundation of all things.