Local congregations
Start a Parish
A parish of Crustianity is a mutual-aid cell with a sense of humour: neighbours, a rota, and something warm to share.
The founding rite
The Seven Steps
No permission needed, no franchise fee, no head office. Seven steps and an oven-warm heart.
1.
Find three people you trust
A parish is three people and a table. Not a committee, not a charity number - three humans who will actually turn up.
2.
Pick a fixed time
Weekly beats grand. A small thing every Friday outlives a magnificent thing that happened once.
3.
Open a channel
A group chat is the modern vestry. Signal, WhatsApp, whatever your people already open - one place for the rota.
4.
Register on this page
Put your parish on the map below so the hungry, the lonely and the merely curious can find you.
5.
Source the surplus
Bakeries at closing time, market traders at pack-down, allotments in a glut. The world throws away a feast every day; intercept it.
6.
Start small
Deliver to an existing food programme before hosting your own share. Carry boxes for the people already doing the work; learn the craft, then set your own table.
7.
Split when big
Past thirty regulars, bud into two parishes. Small is the point - a parish you cannot fit around a table is a parish and a half.
The rules of the table
The Parish Charter
The Charter (v1, a draft for humans, not yet lawyers)
I. There shall be no discrimination of any kind, and no fascists, ever. A breach of this article is not a disagreement; it is a disaffiliation, immediate and total, and the parish name and channels revert to the church.
II. Every parish is financially and legally independent. No parish speaks for another parish, nor for the church; and the church holds no parish money. Your table, your books, your feet to stand on.
III. There shall be no judgment of those you serve. No means-testing, no proving of need, no sermons required with the soup. If a hand is out, fill it.
IV. Safeguarding comes first, before the bread and before the banner. Two adults present, always. Anyone working with children or vulnerable adults completes the local background-check process BEFORE the activity, not after. Every parish names a safeguarding lead, and everyone knows who it is.
V. Food safety is local law, and local law is scripture here. Register a food operation where your jurisdiction requires it; and when in doubt, deliver to an existing programme instead of hosting your own.
VI. Cash is handled by two people together and written down - the two-person rule. Not because we distrust you, but because trust is a structure, not a feeling.
VII. Collect the minimum data, keep it safe, and delete it when done. Names are for greeting people, not for keeping.
Before you begin
Safeguarding & Legal
People first
Background checks and a named safeguarding lead are not bureaucracy; they are love with paperwork. Start with your local process:
UK: DBS checks (gov.uk)
Ireland: Garda vetting
Elsewhere: ask your local authority what checks apply.
Food safety
A community fridge or public share means registering as a food business locally - or partner with one that already has. The inspector is not the enemy; food poisoning is.
Not legal advice
The church provides templates and love, not liability cover; parishes stand on their own feet. Get local advice for local rules - it is cheaper than learning them the hard way.
⛪ The Directory
Parishes of the church
Every listing below is a real table in a real town. Contact details are provided by each parish; be kind, they are volunteers.
The parish map opens once the first charters are signed. Register below to be among the founding tables.
Step four
Register your parish
New parishes are read by a human before they appear in the directory - usually within a few days. By registering you affirm the Charter above, every article of it.