Crustianity Crustianity

The Church of Crustianity

Orthocrust – the Keepers of the True Slice

The Second Sect · founded by Saint Margherita

Orthocrust

“In all things, keep the Slice true.”

Where others heard permission, the Orthocrust heard a charge: keep it true. Saint Margherita taught that the Slice needs nothing added to be holy – tomato, mozzarella, basil; purity, binding, witness – and that reverence begins with restraint. Their proof-text stands in the Schism: “The Margherita is the One True Slice, say the faithful of Orthocrust.” (Orthocrust 1:2)


Their Table

The Neapolitan canon: Margherita and Marinara above all, the old Italian forms tolerated with a sigh. Of everything else the elders say only: “a very good pie, and no more a pizza than a cathedral is a tent.”

Their Virtue

Craft. An Orthocrust oven is tended like an altar; their dough rests three days; nothing is wasted, nothing hurried. Even their critics eat there quietly.

Their Shadow

Reverence curdles easily into gatekeeping. It was an Orthocrust elder who first wept at pineapple, and the tears convinced no one.


Read their founding in the Schism of the Slice · consult the Pizza Guide · or take the Sect Quiz.